the art of the slack
uh huh it’s one of those days where i’m going to manage to look real busy but accomplish very little. there are stacks of documents piled neatly on my desk with the obligatory sticky note attached, my headset is firmly planted on my ass - ha got you! it’s on my head, i can click and switch screens to our irritatingly slow database with stealth and speed…all the trappings of a pro-active go getter. it’s a cold, rainy friday and i wanted to stay in bed. big surprise huh?
one of our in-house accountants just came up to my desk to inquire about some billing - nice girl, really but very heavyset and while i cannot hold that against anyone this particular petunia can’t seem to get the washcloth to all those warm, wet, private places that tend to get funky with neglect. so i sent her away with the fastest - not necessarily accurate- answer and whipped out my essential oils pronto. so i’m encouraging wafts of rosemary and wintergreen and fighting off whiffs of tuna taco.
i’m not sure what some people earn but the idiot that just phoned me from dallas is way overpaid however her pay stub reads. she asks for a fare quote , i give, she places me on hold - no problem it happens - comes back on the line and asks ‘how may i help you’? bitch you put me on hold and forgot!
so stupid and smelly is how i’ve assessed my human dealings so far. i’m in a good mood too - heaven help these crotch-rotten cretins if i weren’t . just hanging on until i can get down to some weekend.
prevention is kinder than destruction. each year over six million healthy dogs, cats, puppies and kittens are killed as surplus. remember: neuter, spay and don't let them stray!